Wow-- great job on the blog, justgotspaid. I wonder if you will even remember your life in two years. This might be a good time to remember, who knows.

Now that I moved the dogs back to Gainesville, my stress level is greatly reduced. I was going through something for a few weeks in August--- mostly just some weird self-pity and doubt phase where I was bemoaning things I don't have and won't foreseeably ever have-- like house, husband, children. blah blah blah.

Luckily I woke up from the haze and realized once again that I might not actually want that stuff afterall and balance and happiness was restored. I wanted, more than anything, to have a boring Sept. with no travel drama and no international travel. I mostly got that. Just one very short and normal trip to Toronto.

Anyway, I'm about to embark on another four day trip to ORF, BUF and SFO. Afterwards, I haven't told them yet, but I hope to go back to Pennsylvania for a few days. With 5 days off in a row this month, I really really thought about going to Korea or Turkey, but I've been feeling a little wiped out lately. Best to visit PA during the good weather week and see dad post-Chemo.

Ohhh if only I could blog from my phone.... Maybe just maybe I would post and post photos. Alas. Too much has even happened to try and catch up. I had a wonderful and hot vacation in turkey with Buket. I got to meet her friend Yasemin at her wedding, spend time with her family, eat amazing food and got my hair dyed purple pink and blue.

Then I worked and worked and worked a million hours all August. Got into a disagreement with my stupid roommate so she is happily moving out on the 31st. I went on a whimsical roadtrip through eastern Canada with my man. I went camping, which hasn't been done in a veryyyyy long time and I met some starfish, thus completing another new year goal!

Well then, why the hell do I feel so stressed and miserable right now? Im back in my hometown trying to spend time with my dad, who was diagnosed with lymphoma. Meanwhile, my dog is back at home sick, throwing up, I don't know what's going on. Dream man is on vacation with his family. And I've realized that I'm probably never going to have a family. I'll never go on a family vacation. My parents are already practically too old to enjoy being grandparents much less ever help babysit. I can barely manage the dogs at this point and I'm stressed out every single day about who is taking care of them when I'm not home. Which is always- I'm never home in Charlotte. Charlotte is not my home. When I am home, I feel guilty that I should be visiting my old parents or my estranged friends who I miss. When I'm visiting these people I feel racked with guilt about the dogs. I cannot win.

I'm not packed at all, haven't solidified dog care and haven't told my parents, but I'm leaving for Turkey tonight-- by way of Rome and Athens, of course. Ohhh the joys of flight attendant travel. Can't wait to see Buket and her family and eat myself silly.

More later.

July has been heavily characterized by work. I kinda of set it up that way. Having my car and my dogs here in Charlotte and friends everywhere else, there was no real reason to try and get back to Gainesville, FL and no big events, like weddings, with set dates that I needed to try and be in attendance. So... my strategy was to painstakingly bid and re-bid to move my days off to the end of the month. I only have 6 more hours to go after this trip today until I can call scheduling and have them officially take me off the roster until August 1 for timing out. I'm oddly proud at my work horse abilities this month. Although, I'm slightly worse for the wear. I have this strange rash on my chest that might be MRSA or just a bug bite that is spreading. Plus my back has been in pain for the last week or more.

I can't complain that much, the trips this month have actually been pretty good. I got to go to BUF twice, SEA and SFO which are always fun and pretty. I'm off to SEA again in a couple hours, but its one of those sleep-in-the-hotel-by-the-airport and leave promptly the next day routine.

Then I get to go and join E for some beach time. The first fun I've had all month.

Today, though I learned that I am once again a line-holder for August. I have a set schedule and some, cough, limited freedom and control. Of course, I don't feel any measure of confidence in scheduling anything as I'm going to try and change my schedule 100% by bribery and manipulation. Goals are important.

Now... the real stress. Decision time. Go to Turkey for 5 days OR music festival with the love of my life? There is no doing both. Alas. Good problems, good problems. Still, I feel like I'm always letting everyone down.

It is really wonderful to have to dogs around again. It might be a little bit more work and stress trying to manage who is caring for them etc, but its great to come home to two little happy dogs.

If I could solve my icloud issues I might actually get a chance to put some pictures up. Always something...

I'm off to Buffalo again tonight. I've had a very lucky July with getting a long BUF layover every week. <3

Happy half-year! Can you believe 2015 is half gone already!? What!?!?

Because I like to do this- lets see how I'm doing on my 5 new year goals:

GOALS

1) Get out of debt completely. Debt free in twenty-fifteen!
Status: Almost. I am very, very close.
2) Get the dogs back. DONE!
3) Have an in-person, in-the-wild interaction with a starfish. Not yet...
4) empty my email inbox NOT EVEN CLOSE
5) Get another stamp on my passport DONE! Korea and Brussels

Ok- not bad. I have 2 down, 2 to go and one close. Feeling pretty good at this half-way mark.

June was a great and busy month; bachelorette party in Chicago, wedding in Cleveland, moving my dogs to Charlotte and some wonderful times with the bf and friends. Speaking of which, the bf has been crushing it. He was a super-super good date at the wedding. This is a huge first for me. Usually I wish I would have left my date at home the detract from the fun so much. The wedding itself, and being a bridesmaid was a fantastic experience. I really enjoyed the whole event. My friend was a gorgeous bride and the event was spectacular.

Then he worked it out to come down to Florida, see some more of my favorite places in Gainesville, help me drive the dogs up to Charlotte and most important deal with my emotional fallout. Not only did Kyohei and Chitah cry as I started to leave (guilt guilt GUILT!), I learned that my ex-husband, has, in fact, been married for the last 6 months at least. He didn't feel this was worthy of bringing up though he is on my insurance. I did his taxes and he used my bankroll to get a new apartment in Orlando. Nice. I shake my head.

I just came back from a 4 day trip. The first day, the news about the elections in Turkey had just broke, so I'm on Whatsapp with Buket, who is explaining Turkish politics in terms of Game of Thrones to me. Amazing. I have no doubt that she will be a super Poli Sci prof in a year or two.

The first night, I get to layover in Tampa which means I got to see my friend Tara. We had an amazing time catching up. She recently got engaged and her wedding plans seem incredible and I've very happy for her.

Day two, I had a 23 hr layover in SJU- San Juan, Puerto Rico. This is my first time to get this great layover, so I've very happy. One of the FAs goes to SJU all the time, so she lead us around for food and things. Then I caught up on Games of Thrones back in my room.

Another short overnight in Chicago and here I am, gleefully packing for my friend's wedding in Cleveland. Fingers crossed there is still space on this flight in an hour. This will be my.... 4th, I think, time as a bridesmaid not counting the few weddings Ive had psuedo bridesmaid-like duties. In fact- 4 years ago this day I was a bridesmaid at E's wedding. Shout out!
I should be a pro at this. Lets hope.

1) I'll probably never blog like before, unless there is a magically place that feels like the blogging world of last decade- i.e. not the over saturated world of Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, etc etc etc. Also- whatever this space is, I will need to do it from my phone. My life is just too mobile now and putting pics on this thing and writing is too time consuming and awkward. Awkward as in how the website works- not as in how I feel about my life. Honestly, I would love to go back to the old xanga days where my friends commented and checked for updates and I had all these travel pics and write ups and feelings... and random thoughts on pop culture. But, alas, it might not be again. I feel like I am writing in a post-apocalyptic online world. I'm the Mad Max of blogging... just doing it because I did it before and not even doing it well. And for whom? Myself? Maybe.

2) I need to find a way to de-stress. This merger and all the constant bullshit that changing an entire airline consists of is just too fucking painful. My freedom is lost. The contract doesn't match our reality. Misinformation is spread on facebook because there are no actual resources to find information. I just have to get a day off for this wedding I'm in in two weeks. By GOD, I shall find a way.

3) My latest travels were through Brussels and Budapest. I lost a friend, a lot of money, discovered that I love Budapest VERY much and got closer to two other friends... somewhat more epic in both failure and success than usual. I guess I have to let life events happen and I also have to accept and learn that not all my friends have to be my friends for life. Its OK to cancel your subscription on someone who is drastically shitty to me-- right!?

4) Still in love, very in love. Very OK with that right now. He volunteered not only to be my date for this wedding, but also asked to go to church with me. I almost swallowed my tongue. Utter pleasant disbelief. I had to practically taser Kyohei to do this activities with me and then he ruined them by drowning the atmosphere in negative energy. It took me seven years of Sundays and 4 or so weddings to walk out on him. That someone I liked would ask to do these things with me is TOO.GOOD.TO.BE.TRUE.
CAUTION

I don't even know where to start. The beginning of March started this much hyped and awaited for bidding system for the way our flight attendant schedules are passed out to us. Not knowing how to manipulate the schedule, I felt a bit trapped and unsure of myself. Never-the-less good things happened.

March started off with this hellish four day trip, which was great because I flew with a very cool girl. (New friend, yay!) Then, I called off sick and spent the next ten days of the month frolicking in Charlotte, Florida and Savannah with the current love-of-my-life in what was an epic Spring Break/ St. Patrick's Day celebration. Somewhere in the midst of that, I learned that the last asshole I was dating got some other girl pregnant and now- even to THIS DAY, I am embroiled in baby-mama-drama that delights my Old Testament sense of justice. muah ha ha ha ha ha!!!

Then I flew to Alabama to visit my long time bestie and get bridesmaid wasted on gin and beer. Dear Lord! What effect does Alabama seem to have on me?

When I finally went back to work on March 23, I got to fly with these two nutty ladies and got a 24 hr layover in an all-inclusive resort in Jamaica. Read: Rum, Kayak, rum, jerk chicken, rum, rum, rum. This sort of good fortune with layovers never happens, so I was taking full advantage of the fun.

The next trip I had, I got to visit Lindsay in MSP and Asli and Tolga in NYC and my friend Mallory on another trip. All friends trip!! So much fun. Along with that, I also got to randomly see my friends Mandy and Jackie when they popped up in Florida by surprise. March might have been the best month of my entire life for both 1) love 2) friends 3) loving my job 4)making money and 5) getting rid of an asshole and seeing him get what was coming to him. Just fantastic. I literally did a dance of praise for the Almighty. I think I'll do another just thinking about it.

April-- Also GREAT!
I got off of reserve and I used my powers as a "Line-holder" to manipulate my schedule to my liking. I managed to make it to my friend's bridal shower AND KOREA! I also got TWO long layovers to visit my true-love when he wasn't coming down to Charlotte (twice!). Man, its just too good these days. I had a little trauma getting back from Korea and, would have strongly preferred to stay longer, but who doesn't have to sleep on an airport floor from time-to-time. By sleep, I mean try and block out the radiating fluorescent lights and creepy new-aged piped in music by listening to Josh's podcasts for three hours. Shout-out to one of my original blog-bestie, Dr. J!

Please check out Travel Medicine, a podcast. I was recently a guest speaker on the show....eeee!!

OK, its May now, but I really feel like I should go back insert some photos, am I right!? I think I'm just going to do a separate post about Korea next

BEST NEWS EVER: My little brother got engaged! I'm so happy about this!

I know I shouldn't blog in a bad mood because I'll just type a rant that no one will want to read--including future Justgotspaid herself.

That said, this is the worst month. I mean, not this February specifically, just in general. It's cold, winter weather is always fucking up travel and Valentine's Day... well, that exists.

This V-day, I worked in the same shop I've been working in for the last 8 years. It was hell. I felt like I had been drafted into a North Korean labor camp; on your feet for 18 hrs, no heat, the toilet broke, no other sanitation, limited food. I'm pretty sure that is that last of that.

In other news, the merger continues. I was determined to have a good merger party time, so I got pretty drunk at the Mexican place the night before with Conquistador.

I showed up the training the next day and was face to face with my old roommate / betrayer. I guess we can kind of move on now that its been a year. Still, seeing her was a bit weird.

Most other female flight attendants were doing their best to look great for their new ID photo that was being taken at training. I, however, decided on a different tactic. I wanted my work ID to actually look like I do at work, so I showed up sleep deprived, hungover, with some ridiculous amount of necklaces on and with my hair thrown hastily into a messy ponytail. No looking twice at my ID for TSA now!

After all that, I snuck up to Toronto for a bit for a very special trip and then drove home to see my family in Pennsylvania. Note to self: try not to sign up for that much winter driving again.

As this month comes to a close, though, I guess it wasn't all bad at all. I am very much looking forward to getting off of reserve in (hopefully) April and for the end of snow-pocalypse and winter flying delays and other disasters.