Friends!

 I am one of the luckiest people ever when it comes to friends.  I really can only be in a bad mood for a few hours until one of them brightens my day.

Last weekend, I drove up to Surfside Beach, South Carolina to see my good friends, Eleanor and Nigel.  I'm so glad that E and I are still tight even though we live a few states away these days. 

The main excuse to go up there was to see our favorite DJ, Girl Talk again.

This guy is amazing and his shows are so much fun.  I also had a "Cheeseburger in Paradise" at the so-named Jimmy Buffet themed restaurant.  If you have to eat meat, this is a great place to do it.

They live literally next to the ocean, so we went to the beach.  E was just telling me about all the ridiculous (and sometimes nice) beach weddings when they started setting up TWO weddings.  One on either side of us. 

Of course we had to watch. ha ha. 

Saturday night we got on a Turquoise Jeep kick and stayed up until all hours of the morning watching all their videos on YouTube and laughing hilariously.  Here is a little taste:

ridiculous, right?

Yesterday I was in kind of a stressed out mood again (I mean, I had just written the last post, right?), then the two friends I am visiting in Turkey; Bora and Pinar conference Skyped me and planned my trip (awesome, thanks!).  Bora found a round trip flight from Istanbul to Antioch for 119TL (Turkish Lira) which is like $66 (US), amazingly cheap, even by Turkish standards.  I can't wait!

Next stop, over to Buket's.  Her friend Ayse just graduated from film school and I got to watch her final project!  Hopefully I can post it later, it was very cool. 

Then hanging with my roommate for the next 2 days, Tara.  We are going out tonight--sort of her last night before she moves to Tampa    Now I really have to start getting my own stuff, ha ha.

Half-year update; an attempt to return to the blog

 I have a lot to cover.  Maybe I shouldn't try and do it all in one blog....or maybe by writing too much, only my most devoted will read it... who knows.

First, I'll start with something that no one cares about:  how am I doing on my New Year's goals?

New Year's Goals 2012!!

1) See something amazing -- I don't think this has happened yet, but I am going to Turkey soon...

2) Visit 2 distant friends-- I saw Eleanor & Nigel twice, AND I'm going to Turkey soon....

3) Read another 10 books-- Uhm, sadly, sadly, I've only read 4 so far

4) Go to the beach at least 8 times-- DONE!  I think I am up to 10 now.

5) Appear in a play or do some public performance-- Well, I did appear in a friend's benefit dance show, so, I guess this is DONE, though I did think I would try and be in a play

So, amidst the chaos I'm actually doing OK on my goals. 

I had a good summer.  Despite all the weirdness in my life, I had fun, I had FUN.  Sometimes it felt like I was out every night doing something.  I don't know where all the energy came from, but it was there. 

Some photo highlights

I went to St. Simon's Island (SSI) with Mallory and Buket

Buket and I

I had a great trip home to Pennsylvania.  I had to sleep in the Detroit Airport one night, but I turned in into an adventure

Kayaking with my brother, Dad (not in photo) and cousins

Saw Jackie (bestie and rommate from college and her family in Hilton Head... then up to Eleanor and Nigel's in Surfside Beach

I went to Savannah Craft Brew Fest suddenly Labor Day weekend:

And the art museum at SCAD in Savannah:

I love SCAD & Savannah

Another party with friends

I discovered that I really love to build furniture (while drinking Moscato)

****Travel Plans!!****

I am finally going to Turkey next month!  I found a super, super low airfare ($800) and didn't think twice.  After studying Turkish for over 2 years, it is high time to try it out.  Now that I have a few friends who live there, I will be visiting them.  Hooray!  My plans are to go to Istanbul and Antioch.

*******************
Finally, probably the biggest reason that I haven't been blogging since May.  I guess I'm ready to actually put this out there... at least to the tiny, tiny circle of people who read my blog.  I decided to move out.  I don't know what the future holds for Kyohei and I.  Maybe we will work it out, maybe not.  It isn't because of any one incident... just a feeling of hopelessness that I had/have.  I just gave up and then I realized that I had been doing all the trying for 7 years. 

I've been playing the gypsy since May, living in a couple different places, my worldly possessions here and there.  My summer home was lovely, but I am currently squatting at a friend's apartment while she moves.  It is a strange way to live-- every night there are fewer and fewer of her possessions at my disposal.  The other night, I ate dinner out of a pan that Eleanor gave me because she packed the plates.  Time to get my own stuff. 

I JUST signed the lease on my own apartment, which I will move into after Turkey in November.  I honestly never thought it would go this far.  I'm so stressed out about money, moving, and my future.  Of course this is the perfect time to take a big trip abroad, right?  I had a cry-fest the other day at the thought of leaving my beloved apartment and dogs and about having to go through the tremendous hassle of moving and starting over.  Kyohei remains unfazed by any of this.  This is a blessing and a curse.  I mean, why doesn't he care if I move out, right?  ouch.  On the other hand, at least all the drama in my life is self-created and I don't have to deal with anything from him.  God, what is wrong with me?  I'm going to make it through this right??

goodbye

 Last night I went to have my eyebrows waxed (as I do),but not because I needed it, rather because it was my hairdresser Jayme's last day of work.  She is quitting to go back to school.  I've gone to her since I moved to Gainesville like 7 years ago.  This is worse than breaking up with a lover.  She has seen me through it all--- wedding color, blonde, purple, bangs, long to short, to brown, to highlights to no highlights to my current (somewhat distinct) hairstyle. 

I feel grief and do not know where to turn.  I don't want to trust anyone else. I don't want to tell anyone else my life story. 

Ohhh Jayme, come back to me!

normal broadcasting to resume shortly...

 Where has my blogging gone to?  My life is getting confusing-- maybe in a good way, maybe not. 

At any rate I had a good vacation back in Pennsylvania with my family last week.  Tonight and this weekend I am off to visit with my old college roommate and besty, Jackie, and then on to El_nor's.  Can't wait. 

Otherwise, things are on the positive side. 

I'll leave you with a clip from my favorite movie.  This sort of sums it up

Awesome.

 When I did the pilgrimage in June-July 2009, I often daydreamed about setting up a rest area for pilgrims.  I was so often moved by the generosity of others. 

Texan opens Shikoku lodge to help travelers complete Buddhist pilgrimage

...

I got sick.  My throat hurts, my lympth nodes are crazy big and my gums hurt like hell.  That's not normal.

I'm taking penicillin.

I feel...

When am I going to get my "ness" back?  

Where did I go and how will I know it is me when I find her?

things that suck today

Hurricane Debby
Mark Rubio on The View
Syria and Turkey Conflict  (don't mess with my 3rd favorite country, Assad!)
Firefox
lunch date with my boss to talk about my future

Why it will be OK later

Happy hour with atypicalindividual

Buket comes back to Gainesville tonight. 

horror show

 Thanks to WillyWop for sending me this link:  Defector's Drawings Offer Rare Look at Brutal Life inside North Korean Concentration Camps

Very horrible. 

Which prompts me to give China the evil eye again.  You knew what you were sending these people to and you did it anyway!!  SHAME ON YOU

Repatriated refugees executed

North Korea has publicly executed four refugees who were repatriated by China and sent 40 others to its notorious prison camps, a South Korean activist said yesterday.
China has repatriated 44 fugitives from its communist neighbour in recent months, said Kim Heung-Kwang, who heads NK Intellectuals Solidarity, a Seoul-based defectors’ group.
Four of them were executed and 40 sent to camps for political prisoners, he told a seminar. South Korean rights groups say there are six political prison camps in the North holding around 200,000 detainees. Kim said he had obtained his information from a source inside the North, but gave no details. AFP

Carousery

 Look, I can make up words too.  Why, why, why haven't I been posting?  Probably because everyday it would be like:  I'm not getting as much studying and reading in as I would like, but I did go out for a drink with _______ and it was super fun. 

I think all the fun might be catching up with me.  I'm feeling a little tired and congested.  Oh well.

Top 5 things that are going on with me

1) Ballet has been AWESOME.  The leader of the company has taken over for our regular teachers who are on vacation.  No wonder she has such an amazing dance company... her eye for dance and her teaching style is just fantastic.  Additionally, I've been so sore this week I can barely walk.

2) I have actually been watching most of the NBA games.  What is going on with me that I am willing to watch sports?? 

3) I have upped my Turkish studies by getting a language partner.  I help him with English, he helps me with Turkish.  It's great because he actually makes me speak in Turkish.  A great lunch-break pursuit.  It doesn't hurt that he looks like this either:

Ok, so he has his clothes ON when I see him, but he does like to put lots of photos of himself in facebook.  bahahaha, what a peacock!

4) To celebrate my 2 month anniversary of the eye surgery, I donated my 2 pairs of glasses

and had a cocktail

5) Ed was in from out-of-town last night so he, Tara and I (ex-flowershop friends) went out.

... and I had a breakthrough!  We eventually ended up at the gay bar and I finally attracted a lesbian!  You may or may not know this, but having never been 'hit on' by a woman has been weighing on my self-esteem for years.  She was a big and beautiful black woman with a fantastic weave.  She asked me what I was drinking, touched my breast AND told me that I had a great ass.  I am SO HAPPY.   Finally I was able to attract a woman!  Mission accomplished.

Scratch that off the bucket list.

summer rains

"Rain Pourin, all my cars is foreign, all my broads is foreign, money tall like Jordan"

Yes, I'm feeling you-- I'm enjoying my foreign cars and men ha ha ha. 

I still <3 Kanye, even if he is hooked up with Kim Kardashian.