strange day

 I started the day out at the dentist's office.  My last cleaning was Feb 27 and I laid there in the chair thinking about how much my life had changed since that time.  After my gums had been sufficiently poked and scraped, I was feeling strangely euphoric.  Maybe it was because the sun was out.  Maybe it was because I was able to abscond from work for the morning.  Who knows?  

I felt like I was getting my "me-ness" back for the first time since I lost it circa April-May 2012. 

I even saw a friend at lunch and caught up, which was great!  Then I solved a problem at work and I felt smart.  So... everything is going great UNTIL

1) I notice my ex, the good one, the 'one-that-got-away' one, got engaged recently.  Fucking facebook.  I commence to immediately eating icecream with my friend (a friend that I sat in the ER with this Saturday, who is still in a lot of pain, poor girl)

just when I'm feeling that I can almost deal with that because I manage to score a bookshelf from my friend in Women's Studies for my balcony (and if I am able to get hammered tonight)

then...

2) I finally open my email to find an extremely serious message from another friend, who I completely and  obliviously hurt.  I am a fool.  I had no idea.  I don't know how to fix this.  I had no idea I even did this!?  Does lack of intention help my case!?

It's too bad that we are already through the S's in storm names (Sandy), because hurricane Sarah seems to be causing her fair share of destruction and pain. There is nowhere to run, there is nowhere to hide from ..............myself.  

I wonder what Sam Adams is up to tonight?